As some of you are aware, my great friend, Erin, helped me tell my story about my stroke, and a few other things 10 years ago, shortly after returning home from the hospital. Additionally, I began sharing pics and video on social media of some therapy and other training I was doing in an attempt to get back to normal. This went on for a few years until I finally decided it was a waste of time. See, maybe 2 or 3 people who followed that journey could even slightly understand what was happening and what brain injury recovery is all about. Yeah there was lots of kind words of support and such, but until yall understand what I was doing, the comments felt empty. So I stopped. I could write 10 books on the subject and most still wouldn’t get it. Also, I was tired of this injury, and recovery work, being my entire life. It was time for everyone to move on.
In fact, when I decided to stop therapy, I told Yoda, my pet name for Deb my therapist, that I need to just start living my life, whatever its gonna be at this point.
I was doing three or four 45 minutes therapy appointments every week, and yes I was making small gains. I was making enough improvement to keep insurance paying, but not enough for me to keep enduring the time, toil, and tears involved. Not to mention 90 minutes on a bus, for 45 minutes of therapy! Once I realized what brain injury recovery really was about, it didn’t take long to conclude I was NEVER gonna golf, fish, hunt, etc, ever again, and the sooner I start learning how to live this new life I created, the quicker I can start letting go of the past and all the things I used to enjoy. Missing those things serve no positive purpose in my life. I have the memories, and that’s enough for now,
I missed the storytelling aspect and decided I need to get back to it, and that’s where the idea for these weekly stories came from. One of the blog stories years ago was about my mom, but hardly anyone who read it, ever met her. My dad, since he was basically my best friend since I was 12 or 13, was known by virtually everyone I knew, so it seemed appropriate to write about him, but as I started downloading memories and kicking ideas around, I discovered the real benefit to this, is for my own introspection. So yes, there will be some rather unflattering things come out about both of us and that’s a good thing. Again, life is hard, wear a helmet.
There really is no roadmap as to where im headed with this. Youll see it as I decide. This is my project, and its for me.
I will do an entire story sometime, but this injury was the best thing that ever happened to me. It changed virtually everything about me for the better, but that’s a future, and very long subject to dig into. Honestly typing one handed wears my out and theres only so much I can get to the page each week.
I introduced alcohol into my stories recently because alcohol was a central theme of dad an I’s relationship.
Alcohol is absolutely the reason my life is what it is at this point and I was absolutely an alcoholic because my dad was. I really don’t care who that statement triggers. As I said last week, finding the reason for something is not the same as blaming them, and this is my platform, and these are my words.
Thanks for reading, and letting me better myself by going through the process. Til next time…Trey out!